Am I what God wants me to be?

Two in one night- I haven't had much time at home lately because we have either been at work or at the nursing home or taking care of other business. I haven't focused a lot of attention on my blog.
I am a thinker. Jeremy says I read too much into things and people's thoughts. He is right, I guess. I have to learn to be me and not what I think everybody wants me to be or what they are. Everybody is different and I am different and it's okay to be that way. I get a lot slack a lot because I say random silly things or because I am disorganized or I am forgetful. I'm not perfect and I will be the very first one to tell you that I'm not. Just today I asked Jeremy if I was a good person. I don't want to not be a good person and I always want to be nice to people. I don't want to be selfish and although I know I can be, I don't intend on being that way. I would much rather go out of my way to be nice to someone than to tell them off. However, that doesn't mean that I don't ever want to blow a fuse. God and Jeremy know me for me. And honestly that's the only two that matter. They both know my heart better than anybody and God knows it most of all. I just wish I could understand that those two are really the only two that matters. I love them both because I can be myself, my true, honest to the bone self. I know that no matter what I do they will love me. That's a wonderful feeling and something I try to stay mindful of and thankful of. I have a lot of growing to do as a Christian and I am looking forward to the next two years in Memphis because I think they are going to help me in so many ways. And maybe I will learn to love me too and learn to be a better person and most importantly a better child of God and a better wife. Jeremy said the other day that we don't need to look back on what we have been but wake up everyday and say am I a good Christian today, and am I reflecting what a Christian should be and I am doing things the way I should. So live everyday for God and what He wants us to do and the rest will fall into place. God Bless!!!

Prayers and grandparents

I'm not sure what my last post was even about. I have been struggling lately to even figure out what day it is. I do know that I asked for prayers for Grandaddy. And I will ask again that you will please keep praying for him and for the family, and especially for Granny. I have thought a lot about things over the past week and everyday when I visit them. They aren't my blood grandparents but they might as well be. When I was in the 6th grade, I lost the only grandparent that I ever knew. It was my Moma's mother. She was a very very wonderful woman and I still miss her a lot. But I was blessed in more ways than one when I married Jeremy...I gained another family which just happen to include grandparents. I think a lot of them. They are each special in their own way. Ga ga as the younger ones call him, always has candy or gum and quarters or dollars for the great grand kids. Oh and you can't forget the chocolate milk. It's very sweet to see how much joy all the kids bring to them. And when you leave he always has a kiss on the cheek for you. And Granny will always always make sure you aren't hungry and would give you the shirt off of her back. They are two very special
people and have made a big impact on those around them. It was told Saturday that Grandaddy would not get any better. And he has actually
been a little better the last couple of days. We don't know what's going to happen, God knows and He is in control. If something does happen, I can't help but to think of Granny and it breaks my heart to think that somebody would live alone without their spouse after being together for almost 60 years. A marriage is not always easy but it says a lot when you are still holding strong to the marriage vows you made 60 years before. She will have a support system by her side no matter what, but it can never replace a spouse. Just keep praying for everyone and that God's will
be done.